So tonight I prayed that God would help me develop kindness and love. I picked a few easy ones. I didn't pick say, patience or faithfulness, because I was afraid he might teach me these things. And to be honest, I'm not sure I really want to grow in these two areas right now. Wrong or right, that was my motivation for picking those two low-hanging fruit to work on.
You see, I've recently realized that God is listening. That God actually hears my prayers and answers them. To some of you this is a no-brainer. "Of course God answers our prayers Blake!" is what you are undoubtedly saying as you shake your head in dismay. And yes I know that. But I don't think I've always believed that.
Until, that is, I started keeping a prayer journal. Without my prayer journal I had no way of holding God accountable. That probably sounds sacreligious, but what I mean is that I had no way of holding God to what I was praying for. I would have some vague prayer before going to sleep and then forget what I prayed for the next day. So if God answered that prayer, I wouldn't necessarily attribute it to Him or even realize that it was an answer to my prayer. Now, though, I am armed with my trusty prayer journal and boy am I seeing God at work.
Which frightens me a little. Several times in the past month I've posed questions to God, and He's given me answers I didn't like. Other times He's challenged me in ways I asked for, but maybe didn't necessarily realize what I was getting into. So it's making me a bit wary. Do I really want to grow in these areas? Do I really want to know the answer to a certain question? If I throw it at God, I now know He will answer and that He is listening.
So I prayed to grow in kindness and love. They seem safe enough fruits to pray for. We'll see.
...on the way home.
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2 comments:
I never post on your blog, but I could relate to this one. I learned a long time ago not to pray for patience until I was ready for it because He will gladly respond to that prayer. But I'm also finding that praying for any of the fruits of the spirit can be tough. My personal experience has been that God doesn't give those attributes, He teaches, and they're not always easy lessons. BUT I think those are good ones to start with. Once you learn love and kindess, the rest almost fall into place.
It's a pretty bold claim to say that there are any "low-hanging fruit", so far as godly attributes are concerned.
I've found when I've prayed for love, God puts people in my life who are difficult to love or try to make it difficult to love them.
Good luck! Or blessings, or whatever you say in response to prayer. :)
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